You Can’t Heal a Broken Heart With Broccoli

On why you need to eat chocolate

Iva Ursano
4 min readMar 14, 2022
woman eating a chocolate bar

Chocolate. ‘nuff said.

I could probably just end this whole article right there with that word.

Really. Chocolate heals broken hearts, not fucking broccoli. Chocolate does lots of amazing things for us. I want to kiss the person who invented it. For real.

I used to eat it every single damn day. There was always chocolate in my house. Nutella, Kit Kats, M&M’s, chocolate baking chips, it didn’t matter what form it came in. I had it and ate it.

I’ve recently revamped my diet because sugar is bad, so now I eat 80% cacao chocolate bars sweetened with stevia or whatever chocolate bar with sugar substitute I can get my hands on.

Because I still need chocolate in my life. The emotional health benefits alone will amaze you!

It really is good for you in more ways than one!

Besides chocolate being good for your mental health, it really does some cool stuff for you all around.

So to help you out a little and give you more proof of just how fantastic chocolate is for you, I compiled a teeny fun list for you.

I get that chocolate isn’t everyone’s thing. I get that some people can’t eat chocolate. I’m sorry for you. I get that some people simply don’t even like chocolate. Sorry we can’t be friends.

But for those of you on the fence as to why you need more chocolate in your life, lemme help you!

Without further ado….

Comfort food.

Try and heal a broken heart with broccoli. I dare ya. Face it, when you’re sad, you want junk food, plain and simple. You want chocolate and cake and chips and pop, and maybe even a margarita? You don’t want fucking broccoli. Who reaches for leafy greens when they are crying a river of heartbroken tears?

No one.

It goes with everything.

Absolutely everything. You can’t dip everything into, let’s say, mustard. Gross. Chocolate goes with sweet stuff and salty stuff. Any…



Iva Ursano