Yes, This IS Gonna Be My Year

On taking responsibility for my life

Iva Ursano

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Depositphotos

How many of you started out 2020 with those exact words? “This is gonna be my year” and then it all went to hell. For everyone. Myself included. But I have to be honest about something. 2020 actually WAS my year until my business collapsed in October.

Ironically enough, Covid had nothing to do with it.

My year of exponential growth

My year started out with great enthusiasm, lofty goals and visions of ending 2020 successfully reaching 6 figures. I worked my ass off. I purchased SEO courses and eBooks. I was going to make it happen, come Hell or high water.

By the time my business collapsed I was nowhere near 6 figures but was still quite proud of the progress I had made and held out for hope that 2021 would definitely be my 6 figure year.

Independent of financial goals, I also had other business growth goals. More subscribers, more life coaching clients, more followers on all social media and more monthly views in Google Analytics (GA).

2020 was all about numbers for me. How high, how many, how big, how fast. I kept pushing myself to reach the next milestone and then the next. At the beginning of the year I had a goal set of 500K monthly website views. I got close. I was near 300K until the October collapse happened.

On October 18th I lost it all.

My dark period

It lasted almost two months. I cried daily, many times a day. I smoked an awful lot of weed. I slept a lot and felt like throwing up a lot. I fought daily with the ‘site’ responsible for my business collapse.

It was exhausting. All of it.

I honestly didn’t know what I was going to do. It took me almost two years to build my ‘empire’ to what it was. What am I going to do now? How am I going to pay my rent, bills, buy food, survive?

I had so many questions and no answers. I was scared shitless. And felt hopeless. Once again, I had hit rock bottom.

Digging my way out and working

When I finally snapped out of depression and wiped away my final tears, I…

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