Why I Don’t Make New Year’s Resolutions Anymore

And neither should you!

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Photo by Zoe Ra on Unsplash

Here we go. New Year New Me bullshit is just around the corner. Joy oh bliss. The proverbial *New Year’s Resolutions* have been made and set, in stone, er I mean sand. Forgive me for sounding so, oh what’s the word, negative? Sarcastic perhaps? We’ll go with the latter as I try to stay away from negative stuff of all kinds, especially my blog posts.

So, yes, it’s new year’s resolution time again as everyone gets ready to set themselves up for another year of misses and disappointments.

It still baffles me as to why we do this to ourselves. And besides, where did this resolution baloney stuff come from anyway? Well I did some digging to find out exactly where it all did come from.

The origin

I seriously had no idea where this idea of new years resolutions originated. Did you guys know? Well, I had to Google it and discovered that it started about 4000 years ago with the Babylonians promising the Gods they will behave (what did they do that long ago that would be so bad anyway?) and in return they hoped the Gods would reward them with abundance so they could pay their debts (um, debts, like their cell phone bill?? colour me clueless).

Anyway, here we are 4000 years later, we’re promising ourselves to behave (oh yes, we’re bad) in hopes of great rewards (you need a miracle to pay your cell phone bill).

This year I’m going to quit………(insert bullshit here)………

Oh don’t get me wrong, there was a day I stood tall and declared with the utmost of confidence “This year I am going to quit…………(and it was usually smoking)”. I told everyone, tell the whole world, right? I mean EVERYONE has to know! Dammit this is THE year!

Of course it wasn’t but I would never know that until February. I think once I might have lasted until April. I did eventually quit smoking cigarettes but that just happened over a year ago, it was a fluke really and it didn’t happen on January 1st. Go figure.

How many of you have proudly declared “This year I am going to quit……….whatever it is you need to drop”. And how many of you missed your mark? *show of hands please* Don’t feel bad. According to Forbes, only 8% of us actually succeed. Kudos to you guys. The rest of us have some serious work to do.

So when did I stop making New Year’s Resolutions and why?

In all honesty, I literally just stopped about two years ago. I was tired of setting myself up for great disappointment and stressing myself out. Why was I putting myself through that? It was ridiculous. Every year I would tell 50 people or so I was quitting smoking and posted it all over my wall on FB.

The days smoke free were bragged about, cheers of congratulations poured in and then whammo, it all stopped. And I smoked my cigarette in shame, hanging my head, looking at my FB wall and thinking to myself, “you’re such a loser”. Every year I did this. It was nothing but pure mental anguish and torture.

So why then did I do this to myself every year? It made no sense. Why did I set myself up for this massive disappointment, year after year? Every damn year I set out new year’s resolutions and within two months I was labeling myself the biggest loser. Why?

It wasn’t just quitting smoking either. It was other new years resolutions, other “ideas” I had that I was sure I was going to accomplish: hit the gym 5 days a week, stop eating sugar (get serious Iva, that will NEVER happen), stop biting my nails (which I don’t do anymore, phew), get a better job, you name it, I made a resolution about it.

But wait, it’s not just me, we all do that. There’s comfort in that for me. I’m not the only one. But I was ready to burn the resolution sign and trade it in for something that might even actually work. And I found something, and it worked.

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Let’s make goals and take action

I’ve decided to replace new year’s resolutions with goals. What do I want to achieve that is actually feasible within a reasonable time frame without driving myself crazy? I set out to do this and these are the steps I took:

  • I grabbed myself a bright neon pink bristle board and a black magic marker,
  • taped that sucker to my wall,
  • wrote the things I really wanted to achieve
  • gave them all dates and
  • look at that thing every damn day.

The more I looked at it and read what I had to, the more determined I was to do it. I told no one. Only myself. There was no peer pressure. No shouts of encouragement. Just me, myself and I saying “you got this girl, let’s do this”.

What happened next still amazes me. By the end of the year I had achieved every single thing on that board minus one (I’ll leave this one to the universe). I knocked every one out of the park! Victory! Yes! I get it now, it works.

Yes, for me, new year’s resolutions suck and I will never make another one for as long as I live.

Oh ya, by the way, that missed goal will go on this year’s bristle board and we’ll see what kind of sense of humour the universe really has.

Peace and Love.

xo iva xo

Written by

Self help Guru|Expat|Website: https://amazingmemovement.com/ mini self help eBook series here: https://books.amazingmemovement.com/

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