Where Did All My Friends Go?

I’m pretty sure I had lots of “friends” at one time. Lemme take you back about 8 years or so ago and tell the story of how I made all these wonderful ‘friends’.

I had just bought an old salon in the heart of the city in my home town. I had never owned a business before. I had no clue what I was doing. What I did know was that I needed to be around like minded people. Entrepreneurs just like me.

So I ventured off and joined a great networking group for women. They all owned wonderful little businesses. We met once a month in a conference center for networking, dinner and fun. There was about 200 of us.

I was promoting my salon. I was also promoting my Feng Shui services. I had a little website and blog set up for that. I had a subscriber’s list and most of my “friends” were on that list.

Almost every month for two years I had dinner with all these lovely ladies. So many “friends”! How nice.

My salon business closed after 3 yrs and I went back to work at the old salon I was at for almost 15 yrs. My new “friends” followed me there. It was good.

There was no need to go to the networking events anymore. I didn’t really have a business to promote anymore and my Feng Shui gig took a back seat. While working at the salon my focus changed. My life changed.

Everything was changing. So fast.

I finally left my abusive relationship, I was starting to work on a freelance writing career as I was pretty much done with hairstyling. Things were just changing. I had turned my Feng Shui website into an inspirational website, started up a FB page and away I went.

My career and life took a 180. Without going into all the boring details of how my life changed, 2.5 yrs ago I found myself on a plane with a one way ticket flying to Guatemala. I had just left everything behind to start a new adventure. A new life.

As my website and Facebook page grew, so did my business. Everything was growing but I noticed one very peculiar thing. My email list reported some unusual unsubscribes.

It happened over the course of 6 months or so (ok so I suck at checking up on that stuff) I had lost a significant amount of peeps and guess where they were from. Mm hmm. My “friends” from Sudbury.


Next I head over to my Facebook personal profile to have a peek over at my friend’s list (Ya I suck at checking that too) and a lot of my “friends” from Sudbury, you know, the business like minded networking peeps, were gone.


So one day, about two months ago, I reached out to one particular woman in messenger. We were pretty close (or so I thought anyway) at one time. Small talk. How are you how are things what are you doing what’s going on? That sort of catch up thing you try to do in messenger

She tells me what she’s doing, I tell her what I’m doing. And then…………..



Ok. Did I miss a “fuck Iva” memo or something? Was there like a secret general board meeting that was held to decide if Iva should just be expelled from this “circle”?

The sensitive Iva took offence to all this. Why did my ‘friends’ leave me? I don’t understand. What did I do wrong? Are they jealous of me? Did they never like me in the first place and were just pretending to like me all those years?

So many questions were going on in my head. It made me sad. It made me angry. Like….w….t….f?

And then one day it hit. My friends don’t hate me, they didn’t hold a private “fuck Iva” meeting, they aren’t jealous of me (I don’t think), I just grew away and apart from them. My life didn’t include them nor did their lives include me.

We’ve just gone in separate directions, and that happens sometimes. It’s not that it’s good or bad. It’s just a thing. That’s life, baby.

People come into your life for one of two reasons. Either they are a blessing or a lesson. These lovely ladies, for the time I had them in my life, were all blessings. They helped me grow into a more confident successful entrepreneur. They served their purpose in my life and now they’re done.

They didn’t un’friend’ me in hate or anger or jealousy or anything like that. It’s just moving on. We all do that.

Some of us grow, some of us stay where we are forever and ever. When we grow, sometimes we leave people behind. And that’s ok ❤

Peace and Love

xo iva xo


Self help Guru|Expat|Website: https://amazingmemovement.com/ mini self help eBook series here: https://books.amazingmemovement.com/

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