Ok I don’t really hate anyone. Not even my neighbour, especially considering he is at the beginning stages of dementia and I am no stranger to this sickening disease.
My Mom’s Dementia Was Funny Until it Wasn’t
So without having to bore you with all the details of what it was like being raised by mom, in a nutshell, she was…
I moved into this apartment building in April of this year. It’s far from town, it’s quiet and it’s really big and beautiful. I am totally in love with my apartment. My neighbours are mostly senior men who are all very nice.
Harry was a nice man. When I moved in he would visit, we would chat. He asked me one day if I could help him with day to day things because he knew he was starting to forget things. I’m happy to help. Banking things, internet things, grocery things, and that one time he dropped his motorcycle and I was the only one available to take him up to the clinic a town away and sit with him while he got xrayed, casted up, cleaned up and sent back home.
That time he lost his apartment keys (but I have a spare for things like that). So many little incidences Harry would need help with. All good. I truly don’t mind. I’m patient and helpful.
Yup Harry and I were good neighbours.
Until last week….
So one thing you need to know first is this…because we live practically at the end of town, many local people drop off puppies and take off and run away, leaving the puppies to wander into our parking lot. I took one in 2 months ago, nursed her back to health and sent her off to a foster home.
About 3 weeks ago, two more puppies showed up. Though I’m not into having more puppies in my apartment, I started feeding them outside my door. They are skinny and starving and need food. I’m happy to do that. One is slightly bigger than the other, a little fiestier/aggressive but nonetheless, harmless. They’re just puppies.
Then they started sleeping at my door. First it was the baby and then both of them made their new home at my door.
Now there is a caretaker who also lives on the property here and though the puppies initially started sleeping in his yard, they found their way to my place. I don’t mind really. When I wake up every morning I have two bundles of cuteness with waggy tails smiling at me. Can you think of a better way to start your day? I can’t (ok well maybe waking up to a hot man might be even better 😜).
These two little jerks have been greeting me every morning. Cheering me up. Making me giggle. Giving me puppy kisses. It’s been the therapy I’ve needed this past two weeks. I look forward to their visits and feel great relief in knowing they have a clean and dry safe place to sleep each nite (though the caretaker made a bed for them, I question the conditions).
So another thing you should know, you have to go through a main gate (which is always open) and pass my apartment door to get to the other units which are all on the 3rd floor. Needless to say, the other tenants more than likely were viciously (insert sarcasm here) attacked by a two month and a 4 month old puppy on the way to their units. Also keep in mind, the puppies aren’t always at my door. They eventually run off into the parking lot and run around and play. They aren’t here all the time.
Someone left a bigger welcome mat at my door one day as the one I have doesn’t hold two sleeping puppies comfortably.
One day I woke up and went to the door. There were no puppies and my bigger welcome mat was gone. What’s happened? I panicked. Where did the puppies go? Are they ok? Where did they sleep last night? What’s going on? Who did this? I felt like someone had just punched me in the stomach.
I found the caretaker and asked him who did this? Sure enough, it was Harry. He had taken pictures of the puppies at my door and sent them to the landlady. She came by, talked to the caretaker, and made sure the gate remained closed at all times. The small opening in the gate that allowed the little puppy to get through was sealed up tight.
The puppies were no longer allowed to sleep at my door. I would no longer have my little rays of sunshine smiling at me first thing in the morning and getting my day off to a happy start.
So now I hear them cry outside the gate. And there’s nothing I can do. And my heart is broken into a million pieces.
But the bigger problem (or should I say lesson) here is this. I know Harry’s dementia is getting bad. I know there is no reasoning with anyone who has dementia. When they have something in their head, you can’t talk it out of them. If they are mad, no matter what, you can’t change their mind. If they put their foot down for something, it’s down firmly and will never be lifted.
No matter what I try to say to him at this point (and honestly I’m not even going to bother) I know I’m not talking to my old ‘friend’ Harry anymore but Satan aka dementia, that has now taken over him. There’s nothing I can do.
So when I need a puppy fix, I go into the parking lot and within seconds they spot me and come running ❤
Dementia is a bullshit disease and it turns the most loving wonderful people into demons. If you have someone in your life who this disease has taken over, be patient and don’t take things personally. It’s not you, it’s got nothing to do with you. It’s the disease.
Peace and Love
xo iva xo