One second, before you get mad at me. I have a little jealous blood that runs through my veins every now and then. Yup. I ain’t perfect. I’m embarrassed to actually admit to this, but I’m also always very honest with you guys. All the time.
You probably know more about my life now then my best friend does.
Anyway, let’s get back to this jealousy thing. The reason I’m writing this is because the jealousy monster has shown up again in my life and I had to beat it away with an ugly stick.
Someone once told me that jealousy makes a person ugly. He was right. It really does. And when I get in my jealous mood I feel ugly.
But I realized something else. Not only does it make me ugly, it also makes me selfish. I get into this ‘oh, it’s always about you’ mood and cry ‘me me me me meee, what about me?’
Ya it’s kinda pathetic to be honest. I suck.
There’s a girl here who’s always going on about her earnings. As soon as she posts them my first thought is ‘fuck off’. Oh ya. That’s ugly. But that’s not iva, that’s the little green monster inside of me called ‘jealousy’.
Yes I’m jealous of her and her ridiculously amazing monthly earnings but I’m also really really proud of her. But pride isn’t the first emotion I feel.
When someone starts talking about something wonderful in their lives, for many of us, jealousy is usually the first feeling to hit.
When jealousy hits us we don’t see anything positive at all. We seethe instead.
“Oh look at you”
“You think you’re hot shit”
“Alright stop talking about your amazing new boyfriend already”
“I really don’t want to hear about your two week cruise”
“Shut up already about how wonderful your life is”
Do any of these sound familiar? It’s ok. Be honest. You’re not the only one.
So why does jealousy hit us like that? Do you ever stop to question yourself as to exactly why you are jealous of said person? I do. All the time. The reason I do though is that it helps me sort through my feelings and…