Dear God…

What took you so long?

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If you’ve been following me the last two days, you know mom was on death’s doorstep. I’ve been writing about it. You can read about it below. This morning I got the call that she finally passed on. Thank God…but wait.

and this one…

Why did you wait so long God? You’ve seen her suffering. You’ve watched her for over 10 years. A vegetable, a shell of a human. Nothing left of her. For over 10 years.

I’m not gonna swear at you. I already did that.

But why? I don’t understand senseless suffering. Especially in humans. What is the point behind it? I already know you’re in control. Why did you control this for so long?

Was there a lesson to learn? Did all of us girls have to learn something? We didn’t. We just suffered in silence with her.

Why do you take some people so swiftly without warning and let others rot away? Where’s the reasoning behind that?

I’m trying to understand.

But there’s no making any heads or tails of this one. It just makes no sense. When things like this happen, it just makes me angry and frustrates me. I wonder about you sometimes.


Anyway, thank you for finally taking her, even though you waited too damn long in my opinion. Did you see her? On her death bed. She was already a corpse before she took her last breath. Why did you want us to see her like that?

Did you forget how much she worshiped you her whole entire life? She praised and sang your name daily. She even dragged us along to praise you. And trust me, I wasn’t feeling much like praising you at 10 years old.

But anyway…

Thank you. For finally answering our prayers. She couldn’t pray to you for the last 10 yrs or so, so I did. I prayed to you almost daily for over 10 yrs, to please take her.

But why God, why did you wait so long?

Dear God,

Thank you for bringing her home. Finally. ❤

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Self help Guru|Expat|Website: mini self help eBook series here:

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